Calyssa's Dollhouse
Community Data for Collaborative Impact
By Calyssa Weaver
I wanted to create a visual representation of my learning journey, something that could both showcase my experience and offer a creative outlet for everything I was moving through. At first, I struggled to find a way to make those experiences visible, to translate something so internal into something others could see and experience themselves, then the idea of Calyssa’s Dollhouse emerged. A space where each room reflects a different aspect of my learning journey, reflecting the challenges, the insights, and the growth that has taken place during this experience. This dollhouse became a way for me to express myself authentically while visually connecting the personal and professional parts of my development.
Being Comfortable with the Uncomfortable
This room represents my learning around being comfortable with the uncomfortable. At the center is a soft, inviting chair, but it is covered in toothpicks, symbolizing the duality of learning to sit in spaces that do not always fit within my comfort zone. As a Type A person, I am used to having a clear plan and understanding what I am doing right away. However, through engaging with large systems work, I have learned that linear processes and complete clarity are not always possible. Systems work is inherently messy, with many moving parts that do not always align neatly. At times, I have struggled to trust myself and my capabilities when I do not fully understand what is happening, often feeling confused or lost without a clear sense of the end result. Over time, I have come to understand that these feelings are not only normal but are an essential part of working within complex systems. This learning has challenged me to embrace that duality, to sit with discomfort while also recognizing growth, and to trust both myself and the process even when things do not feel fully clear.
Relationships are the Foundation
You Can’t Do This Alone
This room represents my learning that I cannot work in a silo and that asking for help is essential. The space is completely dark except for a single lamp that can be turned on and off, symbolizing the difference between trying to navigate the work alone and allowing others to help illuminate the path. Working in the dark, doing everything on my own, is not only ineffective but also disconnects me from the relational aspects that give the work meaning. I often find myself hiding what I am doing out of fear of judgment or being wrong, and this came to a head during the Catamount Fellowship when trying to figure things out independently led me nowhere. It was only when I opened myself up to feedback from multiple sources that things began to shift. I felt lighter, more supported, and gained a clearer understanding of the work I was doing. This experience reinforced the importance of vulnerability, connection, and recognizing that meaningful work is not meant to be done alone.
Holding Space for Myself
This room represents my learning that making time for the things I love is essential. At the center is a coffee table filled with the things that bring me joy, including pizza and Diet Coke, cats, crafts, and books. During my practicum, alongside the Catamount Fellowship, I felt incredibly busy and struggled to make time for myself because it seemed like I had no free time to give. What I have come to understand is that engaging in the things I love is not optional but necessary in order to sustain myself through my other commitments. Free time should be free time, but the time I dedicate to myself should not come from what is left over. It should be intentionally built into my schedule because it is essential for showing up both personally and professionally as my most authentic self. While we often talk about self care, we are frequently operating within systems that do not prioritize or consider our own well being. A friend once told me that rest is an act of resistance, and I have come to see that prioritizing myself and engaging in what replenishes me is not only important but also a meaningful way of pushing back against those expectations.
Rewriting the Narrative
This room represents my experience with imposter syndrome and doubting my abilities. The walls are covered in sticky notes filled with self-doubting thoughts I have said to myself, making visible the internal dialogue that often goes unnoticed. While I do not believe imposter syndrome is something that ever fully disappears, I have learned that these thoughts are normal, and what matters most is how I respond to them. I can choose to dwell in them or challenge them by offering myself counter-narratives and recognizing the value in who I am and what I bring. This learning also connects back to the importance of relationships, as there is power in voicing these thoughts and creating spaces where vulnerability is welcomed. In my experience, sharing these feelings fosters connection, builds community, and reminds me that I am not alone in navigating self-doubt.
Navigating Dual Systems
This room represents my experience of being in two systems at once. The space is split in half, with identical elements mirrored, one side right side up and the other upside down, reflecting the disorientation and tension of navigating two different ways of thinking and working. In my practicum, I am working within a structured system that includes classes, professional standards, and expectations to demonstrate my skills through assignments. At the same time, through Catamount, I am being encouraged to think beyond those structures, to question systems, embrace complexity, and engage more deeply with uncertainty. While both spaces hold value and share overlapping elements, moving between them can feel overwhelming and at times mind boggling. It often feels like code switching, as if I am separating two parts of myself even though they are connected. On one hand, I am encouraged to dismantle systems, think creatively, and embrace the messiness of wicked problems. On the other hand, I am expected to adhere to professional codes of ethics, maintain structure, and meet clear expectations.
Weird Barbie
This room represents my connection to creativity and the moments where I felt that spark begin to fade. I have always enjoyed being creative, but at one point in this journey I felt disconnected from the work I was doing. After a conversation I had with my Catamount Fellows, I was reminded that this experience is not only about contributing to the community partner agency but also about what I need and want to gain from it. That reflection shifted something for me. It led me to ask what felt meaningful and important to explore, which is when the idea for Calyssa’s Dollhouse began to take shape, along with my community conversation where I invited others to engage in creativity as well. This room reflects that shift. There is no clear structure or order to the design. Instead, it is filled with pieces that have been cut, pasted, and bedazzled together, embracing the messy and nonlinear nature of creativity. It represents letting go of the need for perfection and allowing myself to create in a way that feels authentic, playful, and meaningful.
The Work Continues
This room represents a sense of accomplishment and the idea of a growing toolbox. It is where everything comes together. In this space, there is a toolbox filled with tools that symbolize the learning I have had throughout this journey. These tools represent skills, insights, and experiences that I will carry forward into my future practice. It serves as a reminder that this learning does not end here, but continues to evolve as part of my ongoing journey. I will keep adding to this toolbox, continuing to learn, grow, and develop both personally and professionally.
This piece was created as part of the 2025-2026 Catamount Fellowship for Emerging Changemakers.
